IT

Hello friends. How are you all?  Well I have been been looking for it everywhere. ''It?'' What do you mean ''it''? Well in this case, ''it'' is my other name. Or should I say names. Most people call me Ann Marie because that is my name but I am also called Anna, Ana, Ana Maria, Ann, Anne, Maria, and so on and so forth, you know, the same name as Santa Ana the one who will bend over backwards if you are in need of a special favour. Yet not a lot of people know that I have these other names. What names? Those other names that are reserved for those dumbass, public nuisance dunces who call me up during my siesta and want to know who they are talking to. Yes that siesta, the one I am or was having now 'cos it's stinking hot outside and everything and everyone is on fooking fire as we speak. Those numbskulls who call me wondering if I would like to participate in a survey on some shit I will never buy cos I have no money to spare on account of the cost of living being sky bloody high and all that. Things like bottled water. Bottled water!! Did you ever think you would drink the stuff? I always give them a piece of my wayward mind I can tell you. So I found them...what a relief. Here they are. Written on the back of a beer mat I was gifted in Tossa de Mar. The names I use when the cold callers call and ask who they are speaking to. Remember, I always tell them they are speaking to me, the owner of the brothel, AKA Adolfa Bonifacio Ecolastica Homobona Buenaventura just before they hang up.