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Sunday, 11 April 2010


The Spanish are Anarchists in general but I have recently found out that they are arsonists too. They are described as pyromaniacs as there doesn't seem to be a word for arson in Spanish but pyromania is different to arson. Over the weekend all the rubbish and recycling bins were set on fire and I have discovered that this is something you do for a laugh down in Zaragoza too, especially if the bins are near a police station. I suppose I should be grateful really that they haven't started to shove petrol through one another's letter boxes as they do in Britain but they will. Sadly, like a lot of negative aspects of the USA and Britain, it follows you.

I haven't commented on Mercedes and Piti for a while and forgot to mention the episode down the 'ayuntamiento' or council where I finally got the info on noise levels and dog behaviour. To cut a very long one short, after ignoring our pleas to do something about the dog we caught her going into the lift and presented her with the info and she went into one about how it was all our fault the dog was like this and if we call the police we will have to pay the fine. She added that no other neighbours complain ever about the dog and its antics and in fact everyone is allowed to disturb everyone else so long as it is in the daytime. Everytime we gave her the photocopy she threw it on the floor and said it was all lies as she had spoken with the Police and they had told her she was in the right and the dog could howl till its heart was content. I feel I am turning into Michael Palin's character in a Fish Called Wanda, stutter included.

I've mentioned that if you want anything in Spain you had better not want it and then maybe it will turn up. I rang the travel club this time with a couldn't care less attitude and managed to order a lovely Bosch vauum cleaner and got it in just a few days. I realised that like the answerphone services in Britain ( is that what they are called??) you have to keep pressing 'for all other services please press...' to get to speak to a human and it worked.

Regards the 'filter' we had put in. The neighbour who goes by the name 'takes all sorts' asked me again what the hell was going on with the water. I am usually a good judge of character but I can't work out if he is taking the piss or not. I keep telling him we have cleaned the 'filter' and therefore the problem can't be that so, well, what could I say to him, the man is old enough to be my father for Christ's sake. Later I saw him again and he told me that the youth of today had set fire to the bins again and he said it almost as if it were my fault but maybe that was because I was still reeling from Mercedes' comments.

It all ends well when I made another discovery. That The Turin Shroud is called "La Sabana Santa' which, when translated comes out as 'Holy Sheet'

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