Saturday 21 February 2009

NOT TINNITUS JOSEPHINE

Someone called Max Ehrmann said we should 'avoid loud and aggressive persons;they are vexaxious to the spirit' and so I have managed to steer clear of the vipers next door and spent the week without tears and vendettas invading my funky cloud. Psychic vampires abound and one needs protection.

Well, if I have understood correctly, the town has lost the chance to host the Dart's championship or should that be Darts' ? It's not darts as we now it but anyway it hasn't ended up here as there aren't enough hotels and therefor rooms to cater for the throng expected. I did write to the local rag to suggest they could always sleep in our new, 35 million euro Palacio de Congresos.

Thursday was Jueves Lardero', Lard Thursday or Mardi Gras or probably Pancake Day when various Christain cultures stuff themselves with fatty foods before Lent. It never ceases to amaze me how the Spanish can queue when a sauasage is for free. Is it the only time they won't push in? While queueing in the dry cleaner's the other day an old women did what is probably an act of genius where she somehow manipulated her body or rather shape shifted or morphed into the person in front. This has happened before and I am still not sure how they do it.

I asked some friends if they had an expression of 'he needs a good kick up the arse' and somehow through the translation they told me here in Spain it isn't a kick but a firework. I have asked others here and they say they have never heard of this. I do like the idea though. That to get up off his lazy backside a Spaniard needs a surface to air missile shoved up his jacksy.

Lastly, our chemist's sends me e-mails and they vary from mini lectures on gluten and its dangers to marital aids and theirs, but I misread one of them today and thought it said how to prevent or get rid of 'pijos', ( snobs, Essex girls depends on many things...) I have re-read it and it is not pijos but piojos, which I think is lice. I might turn up and pretend I think it is for the pijos and start bawling from the back row.

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